


Three Is Always A Crowd

by Pieceofship



Category: Steven Universe - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Human AU, Human Jaspidot, IVF, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-25
Updated: 2015-09-27
Packaged: 2018-04-23 09:24:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4871527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pieceofship/pseuds/Pieceofship
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Human!au.</p><p>Thanks to IVF Jasper is expecting her's and Peridot's child, but life tends to throw a few curveballs. (Series of one shots.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Three

**Author's Note:**

> Also quick note my headcannon for Human!Jasper is that she’s black with vitiligo, and tends to dye her hair bleach blond, Human!Peridot is Indian with black hair, Human!Lapis is biracial, white and black, Human!Garnet is black.

"Agh, I feel like I’m gonna burst.” Jasper groaned in annoyance, taking another sip from her bottle of water.

“You know they need your bladder full for the ultrasound.” Peridot reminded, idly drinking her coffee, awaiting the red light to change to green before she could start driving again. “You took your iron this morning right?”

“Yes, and I don’t think the water will be the only thing that makes me feel like exploding.” Jasper muttered, “Little parasite likes making its presence known.” she ran a hand across the swell of her abdomen. 

Thirteen weeks ago they started IVF, an attempt to start that family they talked about. Peridot had a busy job as an secretary, Jasper worked as a bartender. Although maternity leave from her demanding job was tempting, Peridot could barely fathom the idea of having something alive being in her, let alone actually deal with all the side affects and birth, it was unappealing. Now Jasper on the other hand, not only was she far more fit but she was less squeamish then her, needles, blood, and everything else in between never bothered her one bit, and she did have the hips for it.

“Did you remember to take your prenatal vitamin as well?” Peridot asked, taking a final sip of her coffee before the light turned green. “You forgot to twice this week.”

“Sort of hard to keep track of every vitamin you put me on.” Jasper rolled her eyes. 

“Jasper, I’m serious.”

“Yes, I took it with that god awful smoothie you made me this morning.” Jasper’s nose crinkled in disgust. “Seriously, who mixes just cauliflower and watermelon together?”

“You always used to mix fruit and vegetables right after you went to the gym.” Peridot reminded.

“That’s different, my smoothies actually tasted decent.” she huffed. “You haven’t cooked a day in your life since we got married, and microwaveable food doesn’t count.” she took another sip of water. 

“What about the fish oil supplements, did you take those?” 

“No way, did you see the size of those things?” Jasper shuddered at the very thought. 

“It’s good for you!”

“Well I don’t think choking is good for me. Look, I get it, you’re worried, but I’m perfectly fine. Besides I totally would eat real fish if I could stand the smell.” she chuckled. “But for real though, if you don’t stop worrying you won’t get a chance to enjoy how horny my hormones are making me.”

Peridot’s face turned red with embarrassment, Jasper was always so blunt and possessed so little tact, not to mentioned she could be very vulgar. She would most likely end up being the “fun mom”.

“I swear you better start watching your language once the kid is born.” she muttered as she drove.

“It’s not born now, and don’t be such a prude. I want to have some fun before my back pain renders me bed ridden, plus that may be sooner then intended, little parasite wants to be big like mama.” Jasper laughed at her own expense, patting her expanding midsection. “I swear if I had a dime for every time someone asked me if its twins I would be rich as hell. So enjoy this well it lasts, few more weeks and I might not even let you so much as to hold my hand.”

“Just shut up and drink your water, we’re nearly there.” she rolled her eyes, but did take a few quick seconds to glance at Jasper’s abdomen. 

Her wife was showing a lot more then they originally thought she would be, Jasper always had a big appetite, and that only seemed to worsen with pregnancy. But of course Jasper was also big on health and fitness, so snacking on sweets was a rarity, but having to go to that health food store every three days was beginning to get rather costly. She tried not to let it concern her too much, Jasper had a large build and towered over Peridot, maybe the baby was just taking after her. It would make sense, seeing how Jasper was the biological mother, the two selected a sperm donor that shared as many similar traits with Peridot as possible, guess this meant Peridot was doomed to be the shortest member of their family.

Another ten minutes of driving and Peridot parked the car in the expecting parents parking area. Not like it mattered truthfully, the majority of the parking spaces were empty, must be a slow day, at least the wait shouldn’t be long. Upon entering the building Jasper immediately went to sit down while Peridot confirmed everything with Garnet, who worked front desk.

“Dr. Lazuli will be right with you shortly, take a seat.” 

Peridot plopped herself down next to Jasper, who already had her nose buried in a magazine. Peridot’s eyes caught sight of a small stack of pamphlets about pregnancy and parenthood, she reached over to take one but Jasper slapped her away.

“Nope.” Jasper stated, not even looking up from the magazine.

“Ow! What was that for?!” Peridot demanded.

“I know you, once you read about anything that could go wrong in a pregnancy you spend all night worrying about it and don’t get any sleep, then guess who has to deal with a sleep deprived wife?” Jasper turned the page of her sport’s magazine. 

In no mood to argue with Jasper, Peridot settled on an old copy of a celebrity gossip magazine, a guilty pleasure of hers. She thought a bit about what Jasper said, maybe she was becoming a bit of a worry wart. 

Jasper was and still the perfect picture of health from the day they met to now, no medical problems, and their doctor even confirmed the pregnancy was going smoothly. Plus it wasn’t everyday Peridot could make it to Jasper’s appointments, she should just let loose and enjoy this.

“Jasper?” Both her and Jasper looked up from their magazines towards the door to various offices, there stood Lapis. Recognizing them instantly, both of them got out of their seats. “Right this way.”  
Lapis led them down a large hallway to her office.  
One thing they both liked about Lapis was she made her office look and feel comfortable, rather then posters and diagrams of medical information Lapis decorated her space with pictures of newborns she delivered, and a cheesy poster of a cat hanging from that tree branch that read ‘Hang in there’. Not to mentioned Lapis had a collection of little bobble head animals, little knick knacks like that usually bothered the hell out of Peridot, but dare to say they were sort of cute, really gave off a calm vibe. 

“Take a seat Peridot.” Lapis instructed, collecting her clipboard and going through the sheets of documents. “Jasper, up on the ultrasound table if you will.” Doing as told Peridot plopped herself down in a seat, Jasper with a little assistance from Lapis, hefted herself up on the table. “Do you want a pillow for your back? I think Dr. Quartz keeps a few in her office.” she offered.

“No thanks, a sore back gives me a reason to boss Peridot around.” she laughed.

“Be lucky I love you.” Peridot teased.  
Lapis chuckled along, scribbling down notes on her clipboard. Another reason they liked her, friendly and laid back with a good sense of humour, it really eased any worry she had about the pregnancy.

“Alrighty then, I understand weight is a bit of a concern. Care to elaborate?” Lapis asked. “What is your diet like?”

“I’m hungry all the time.” Jasper replied.  
“So you snack a lot?”

“Only on carrot sticks, apples, and that kind of shit.” she said. “I got Peridot going food shopping often.”

“And to the bank.” Peridot jokingly added.

“The baby could just as easily be on the bigger side, I once delivered a ten pound one.” Lapis informed. “Our past appointments proved that you are in great shape, if it doesn’t show any medical problems now I can’t say I would worry about it right away.”

“Maybe it’s a surprise twin.” Peridot joked. 

“For your sake you better hope you’re wrong.” Jasper mused. “You’re bad enough now with one kid on the way, but twins? I don’t even want to imagine you with twins.”

“Well, let’s see if Peridot can sleep soundly tonight.” Lapis open a cupboard and grabbed a towel. “If you wouldn’t mind tucking this around the waistline of your pants we can get the ultrasound done.”

While Lapis prepped the ultrasound machine, Jasper tucked the towel into the waistline of her pants, ensuring nothing would stain the white tank top she was usually clad in. She rolled up her shirt, fully revealing the rounded bump that was once a flat and toned abdomen. After Lapis applied a large blob of gel to her stomach, three sets of eyes were instantly glued to the screen.

Peridot felt her heart flutter upon seeing Lapis point out each little feature. It was odd, growing attracted to an alien like grey blob, but Peridot could instantly feel a strong closeness to it. 

“Now, let’s check the heartbeat.” With that being said a soft little 'Whoosh, whoosh’ sound filled the room. 

This was Peridot’s favourite part, seeing hers and Jasper’s baby was one thing, but hearing it was something else. She could never be able to know what it felt like to carry a child right now, unlike Jasper. But this, hearing the heartbeat was something the two of them could experience together.

“Well, everything appears to be in tip-top shape, perfect development-… oh my.” Lapis’s eyes widen.

“Wait… what is it?!” Peridot felt her body tense up. “Is something wrong?”  
Lapis exchanged a nervous look with Peridot before whispering something in Jasper’s ear. Like Lapis, Jasper’s eyes widen.

“Holy shit….”

“Can you please tell me what the hell is going on?!” demanded Peridot. Lapis cleared her throat before exchanging an awkward glance with Jasper.

“Well… you see Peridot, it appears all the fertilized eggs that were placed took.” Lapis explained.

“Which means what?”

“Peridot, we’re having triplets.” Jasper answered, a weak and nervous smile spread on her face.

“Triplets….” Peridot weakly echoed back. 

“As in… three?”

“Yup…” Jasper replied awkwardly. “Peri,are you okay? You look pale.”

“Me? Oh I’m perfectly fine…” she slowly got out of her chair. “Just…light headed.”  
Her famous last words before she fainted.


	2. Eating For Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot has many skills, cooking isn’t one of them. Jasper decides a late night craving for chicken Alfredo is the perfect opportunity to teach her how.

“Peridot?”

Oh come on, not again.

“Peridot?” Jasper’s voice rang again.  
Maybe if she just pretended to be asleep she could avoid this ordeal.

“Are you awake?”  
Come on, just go back to sleep Jasper.

“I know you can hear me, don’t make me get cold water.”

Not wanting to deal with wet and ice cold sheets, Peridot slowly open her eyes and sat up, looking at Jasper. How could she be so perky looking so early in the morning? Her eyes glance at the digital clock, it read two in the morning, why did it seem the world was dead set on denying her sleep? It’s not like she would get any once the triplets were born.

“Jasper, it’s two in the morning.” Peridot said through a sleepy yawn. “Shouldn’t you be cuddled up with that pregnancy pillow sleeping?”

“A pillow doesn’t get me food.” Jasper stated.

“Damn it Jasper, again?” Peridot groaned. “Why don’t you just eat more food at reasonable hours?”

“It’s cravings, Peri.” she replied, as if all knowing. “And may I remind you I’m eating for four?” she patted her midsection, only four months along and she already grown a great deal. “Rather difficult to keep track of.”

With a sigh Peridot left the warmth and comfort of the bed, stepping into pale blue slippers that clashed with her lime green nightgown. 

“Be lucky I love you.” Peridot reached over and grabbed the car keys that rested on the night table. “Let me guess… that place with the mango salsa you like?”

“Nah, I’m thinking more of pasta.” Jasper tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Chicken Alfredo to be more specific.”

“Jasper, that place with the pasta is closed, because any sane person should be asleep at this hour!” she huffed. “And didn’t you say Alfredo has little nutritional value?”

“The brats want Alfredo, not me. We can just make some.”

Of course, every now and then the health nut Jasper started to indulged in a sinful treat. She claimed it was the triplets that wanted this, not her. Most likely just another excuse to not break her health food pride.

“Jasper, you did know I’m awful at cooking.” she groaned. Give her a pile of paper work as tall as she was any day, but her in the kitchen? She was hopeless.

“And with a family on the way it’s a perfect time to learn.” Jasper mused, getting up from the bed. Clad in a white tank top that hugged snugly around her expanding abdomen, and a pair of old black shorts. “I’ll teach you, it will be fun!” 

Jasper did have a point, Peridot couldn’t expect her wife to be the sole cook for their family, especially with three children. With a sigh Peridot set the car keys she held aside.

“Very well..” she agreed, causing Jasper’s face to break into a wide smile, anything to make her smile.

Trailing behind Jasper she fallowed her into the kitchen. Honestly, Peridot only ever used the microwave and fridge, they lived in the era where if you wanted food you could just pop a frozen dinner in the microwave and wait a few short minutes, rather then go through the pain of cooking, which was very time consuming. But Jasper did have a point, Peridot had terrible eating habits, she didn’t really want her habits to rub off on the children. 

Jasper retrieved a knife, cutting board, three wooden spoons,butter, , parmesan cheese, strainer, chicken breast, heavy cream, a cheese grater, oil, fettuccine noodles, and a clove of garlic.

“Peridot, get two pots and a pan, my feet are murder on me tonight.” she paused for a moment. “Or this morning… I guess, whatever.”

Collecting the two pots and a pan Peridot placed them on the counter. Jasper tied her hair back into a pony tail.

“I’ll start on the chicken, you can start boiling the water.” she ordered, already starting to cut the chicken breast. “That would be within your means of skills.”

With a sigh Peridot began to fill the pot up from the sink, pondering why Jasper became a bartender rather then a chef, it seemed more up her ally, she liked giving orders. Placing the pot on the stove, Peridot turned it on and looked back at Jasper. She really was in her element, hopefully Peridot wouldn’t mess this up too badly.

“What do you want me to do now?” she asked.

“Start grating the cheese until the water starts to boil, then add the fettuccine.” Jasper instructed, cutting the last of the chicken into perfectly shaped pieces. “I’ll start cooking the chicken.” she informed.

Grating cheese wasn’t something Peridot took enjoyment in, her hands grew sore easily, something that made her job difficult at times. Picking up the block of cheese, Peridot began to grate as Jasper

“Remind me why you didn’t become a chef?” she asked, finally bringing up the subject. 

“Oh please, if I got some job like that I would be busier then ever, I wouldn’t be able to spend time with my favourite nerd.” she replied, watching Peridot grate the cheese. “Besides, I love bartending, never know what kind of folks you’re gonna meet, especially when they get drunk off their ass and you gotta kick them out.”

“You’re enjoying maternity leave, I take it?”

“Of course, mixing drinks is fun, but a mean drunk is something I don’t take joy in.” Jasper said. “Remember the first time you got drunk with me?” Peridot groaned. “You were such a cute drunk, giving me butterfly kisses, talking about how you wanted to live in a house full of kittens and puppies.” a chuckled emerged from her. “It was so cute.”

“Well the hangover I had certainly didn’t make me feel cute.” Peridot grumbled, shifting the grater to see the amount of cheese she grated. “Is this enough?”

“That’s plenty, the water is coming to a boil, add the pasta, I’ll work on the sauce.”

“What about the chicken?”

“I can multitask, just hurry up and add the pasta.” Jasper went off to measure the butter for the Alfredo.

Picking up the box of pasta she empty it, giving the pot a stir with a wooden spoon. The noodles soften quickly, Jasper glanced over her shoulder.

“Did you just add the whole box?”

“Yes, why?” Peridot questioned, an eye brow raising. “You said add the pasta.” 

“You weren’t suppose to used the whole box, now we got enough pasta to get us through the winter.” Jasper informed, grabbing a spoon to stir the chicken, which was slowly starting to cook, she added butter to a empty pot.

“Oh…” Peridot looked down at the pasta, now that she thought about it, it did seem like a lot for just two people. “I can just take some to work for lunch for the next few days.

"Hope it turns out good then, because we’re be eating it for ages.” Jasper replied, poking at the chicken again, it let out a sizzle as she stirred. “You can go mince the garlic.” 

“Mince?” Peridot stood there with a confused look on her face. Great, now Jasper was breaking out the fancy cooking words.

“Cut it up tiny, maybe add another clove if you don’t lose your fingers.” Jasper informed. “We got a long road ahead of us until you’re a decent chef.” she mused, adding the cheese and heavy cream to the pot.

Fetching the knife and cutting board she began to chop the garlic. Having a paper shredder at work made her feel more comfortable with blades and sharp objects, though garlic was certainly different then paper. Her nose crinkled at the pungent scent, she doubted she would add another clove to the meal, Peridot hated the smell. How Jasper could handle the scent while pregnant was unknown to Peridot, this just made her more thankful Jasper decided to go through IVF rather then her. She always had a sensitive sense of smell, pregnancy would most likely make that worst, how Jasper managed to stay perky while with triplets was also beyond her. Once minced she turned to Jasper, no fingers missing so she must had done it right.

“Is this good?”

“Perfect, add it to the sauce, then drain the pasta.” she ordered turning off the panels that belonged to the two silver pots. 

Doing as instructed Peridot tossed the garlic into the pot. The kitchen smelled amazing with the exception of a hint of garlic. Giving the sauce a quick stir before going off to drain the pasta. The pot was heavier then she thought it would be, maybe Jasper was right after all these years, maybe she should start working out. With the strainer over the sink she carefully poured the water. A cloud of steam fogged up her glasses, all she could see was white blobs enter a larger white blob, she certainly hoped it was the strainer rather then everything ending up in the sink. Once the pasta was drained she wiped her glasses clean, much to her relief not a single noodle ended up in the sink.

“Looks good.” Jasper commented as Peridot transferred the pasta from the strainer back to the pot. Jasper then tossed in the creamy looking Alfredo sauce and chicken into the pot, mixing it up.

The aroma was intoxicating, Peridot didn’t intend on eating so early in the morning, pasta wasn’t something she normally ate at this hour, especially for breakfast, but it smelled amazing. Jasper fetched two bowls and two forks , handing one of each to Peridot. Jasper quickly filled up her bowl with a large amount of pasta, then quickly eating a forkful.

“Is it good?” Peridot questioned, filling up her own bowl.

“Perfect.” Jasper purred. “Couldn’t had turned out better.”

“For someone who’s a health freak you seem to be enjoying those carbs right now.” Peridot said, a smug grin on her face as she tried the pasta. 

Jasper wasn’t kidding, the pasta was good. Chicken was moist, sauce was creamy, and the pasta was cooked to perfection.

“Oh shut up, I’m carrying three damn kids. If I want to enjoy throwing my carb intake out the window every now and then I deserve too!” she hissed, eating another forkful.

“I never said you couldn’t, we all have cheat days, but you actually have an excuse.” 

“Just shut up and eat your pasta.”


End file.
